Memories of Church As a Child

Today’s thoughts due to last weeks meeting-

 

When I was a small girl about 8 years old, actually in the beginning of my father’s perpetual LAST slide into alcohol and the delights of cocaine, my mother had a very large mole removed. At the time in my eyes it was a dire situation and my mother relished treating it as such.

Neighbor women arrived to sit watch, whatever that was.  From my perspective it was all about a period of time  when the neighbor/school ladies who you gossiped fiercely about at all other times were welcomed into your home with graciousness. Casseroles seemed to have a great deal to do with the whole ritual. Looking back on it, it was the closet thing to  a family reunion that I ever experienced. In general Cali’s don’t  sit watch and in all due cases rarely  give a rip about a mole removal or a death in the family, so it was actually a big deal.

So, for 3 days after the Great Mole Removal, our house was  a wonderland of gossip and casseroles.  I recall with trepidation- the Great Tinfoil Shortage……several large women I didn’t know  in a panic about how to cover and thus preserve arriving casseroles once Reynolds aluminum was wiped out. That was about as deep as it got, but there was one  wonderful thing that happened……

For the 3 days that women arrived to sit and guard food, it seemed to me, anyway, my father was  even more scarce than normal. See. Some of the neighbors, were what he called “church ladies” and he found it difficult to sneak round and drink incessantly while under  such a watch.  Mostly he was a beer man then , but was just acquiring  his scotch taste. He viewed the women as deacon harlots (hi s term) and remained in a constant fit of paranoia while they were in house. In fact fter the 1st 24 hours he spent most of his time after work in front of the TV tightly gripping a spiked Coca-Cola and shooting the evil eye at the helpful women.

As for me, I have awfully fond memories of it, truth be told! Our home never had such warmth and so damned much hot food. By that age  was accustomed to heated up a bagel for myself if I desired any breakfast. And packing the Barbie lunch box was always a solitary affair. To have these people doting on me and feeding me, well it made me feel all warm and fuzzy. They were the aunts, uncles, and grandparents I had left behind. For three days I was part of a family.

The local Methodist preacher,  Pastor Lester, even came and visited. I fondly remembered him as the guy who gave a rousing sermon at Easter, the one time my parents took me to a church. He was funny.

After the successful cosmetic procedure my mother was invited to that Church an dwe actually went  at least 3 times in a row. I had my name  on acute cutout at Sunday School and was learning some neato for the next few Sunday  when bamo-! Someone offended my mother.  Then Bro. Lester got run off for an indiscretion,which I never fully understood and the church split wide open.  My dad DELIGHTED in this and harped on it 24/7 until I suppose Mom just gave it up. The Bubble Bus still picked me up the next few Sundays but I found myself feeling unnerved at facing my inebriated father and I gave up too.

 

Still , those few Sundays when I was scrubbed and dressed and hauled off to “church” were probably the fondest memories I have of my folks marriage.

In the past couple of weeks I hve seen parents action s in the Church, their response to an offense real or imagined deeply hurt their children and their children’s friends. I am not judging but feel I should share the reminder to be careful about accepting “offenses” and jerking your fmily up to change churches-I beg you to be aware of how it might affect your child or family members…..It is harder to stay nd work things out where the Lord has set you that it is to up and leave in THE SHORT RUN. But I gurantee you that  cutting and running in a time of conflict in your church in the long run can destroy lives!

 

Love,

sd

It ‘s been unseeingly humid down here lately.

It ‘s been unseeingly humid down here lately.  We even had a
thunderstorm, reminding me of Mississippi…………..the hot summer rains
that arrive  from a gunmetal sky and drench the red delta dirt  of my
childhood visits to “home”.   Those rains inevitably caused the old
white men in the Kroger’s to fret and grumble if the cotton had yet to
be picked up. But that’s another story.  For some reason I always
thought of Mississippi as home, even though at an early age I was
uprooted and transported to  California. In California, it seems that
no one has roots there, that everyone  originated from somewhere else.
I ‘ve never felt entirely comfortable calling it “home.” And so.
But here I am completing my 16th unlikely year in the unlikely
environs of  Baja California Mexico.
Who’d of ever thought I’d wind up  here…….and call it “home?”
Back to the weather, though.  It had me feeling a bit homesick and out
of sorts………………….but the clouds broke around  5:30 and the air  brought
the smell and chill of the ocean so close by. I  decided to say
“forget it, for now” and procrastinate on gathering  the receipts for
last month for which my crazy bi-polar accountant is hounding me
already, and to sit on the balcony with  little green coca-cola.
No sooner than I arranged myself on a lounge chair with my icy soda,
than I see puffs of dirt on the trail thru the weeds from the
cuarteria to the mission. Voices carry thru the now brisk air, and
little ones start appearing getting larger and larger as they
approach. Still most are only about 3 feet tall. It’s “toddler’s hour”
when the littleun’s come to get their 2 liters of water. At the end of
the line  is a bigger one though.
I cant tell who it is , just another brown round face in the setting
sun, but as the silhouette nears a bright white smile appears. Big
white teeth and dinner-plate eyes. It’s Aquilino.  I am trying to
figure why the big smile which is visible for some 400
yards…………….hmmmm.
As he gets below the balcony, I’m bursting with questions. (It’s been
a slow day at the mission, and I’m a Mexican neighbor now, and well,
we thrive on NEWS. Not CNN, or MSNBC, neither of which I get, but
neighborhood news. Who had a baby, why did the police come, who’s
arriving or leaving from or to Oaxaca……………….the lifeblood of a “slow”
day.
The news is actually minor so far.  But I feed him a sandwich as he
regales me with tales of someone’s grandmother and his cousin (both
the same person, go figure but everyone but me is related) and I
continue to ply him with chips and half my soda to get the real source
of the smile on his dirty little face.
See I ‘ve learned that here nothing is fast or easy, watches are
scorned and dates not really applicable unless you own money and even
then, well , it’s Mexico, right? So I am impatiently playing patient
pastora, because this guy is just grinning like a madman.
Finally, I can’t hold it.  “So Filli, (which is what everybody calls
Aquilino, only the Lord knows why, but no one in Mexico goes by their
birth name , but an “apodo” or nickname that has usually no bearing or
reason in it’s assignation). When I call him Filli, he gives me a sly
look. Like okay down to business.
“Hermana! They are back. THEY are back. The Ixpa’s. The funny people.”
And I am instantly hungry for details and so intrigued as he tells me
of two families who were moved OUT of the Camp to make way for these
curious Ixpa’s. They were here like 5 years ago. And Filli was totally
on love with the oldest Ixpa girl. Ayela.
The thing is tho that the Ixpa’s are not from Mexico. They are a part
of a Brazilian tribe, who somehow stole over Mexico’s Southern Border,
then got stuck in Puxtla, Oxa. Then got to know some triques and made
their way up here. Really rare and a bizarre group to the Mexican
Indians. An “exotic” people.
Filli and I bust open another Coke and reminisce to his 7th birthday
when this exotic  group arrived.   They are exotic, more so to me than
even the Zapotepos which rarely arrive from Guerrerro. They are so
otherworldly, like something from a National Geographic page as the
women go topless and bath in the open…………………….and the little boys wear
a little leather pouch around a strategic area, and even the big boys
revert to this on the days off. They will live in the Camp but apart
in their yurts, thee mud and stick huts that they are already
constructing…………(I sent Aquilino down with my camera tonight hopefully
he’ll have pics by manana. He ‘s on a secret  correspondent’s
mission.)
So I look forward to seeing if they will remember me, if they are the
same families who were here years ago and a million other  things.
There is a buzz of excitement as I now here other children telling
Frank downstairs that “they” are back.
I am blessed to live this excitement. But MOSTLY truly the blessing is
the smile on Filli’s face when he arrived. And the way he included ME
in the neighborhood excitement. Taunting me with his “knowledge” but I
m grateful that I have been accepted. Like the news arrived and it
needed to be delivered and though I am a foreigner, I am on the
“pipeline”.  A neighbor.  It is a privilege for which I thank  Jesus.
For me it is a big deal to feel a PART of the community, not a visitor
but a member.  It is the Gospel that has made us such for no other
glue exists between us but that we all BELIEVE in HIM.
Praise JESUS